Friday, April 4, 2014

D-Day can now happen. We have our PBO!

It’s a exciting week this week because we finally got our PBO (pre-birth order) from the court.  This is the major, most important, paperwork of all because it allows the state to actually look at us at the ‘legal’ parents, even though this little man is genetically ours.  

The PBO is quite a long process, which is normally started early in the 2nd trimester because without the PBO we have no legal rights to the baby, at the hospital, or after discharge.  We got our’s a little late in the game, as typically you want to have it before the 25th week,  but now that we have it we can all breath a sigh of relief. 

When a surrogate is used, hospital and state birth record procedures operate to put the surrogate’s name on the original birth record as the child’s mother simply because she gave birth. If the surrogate is married, her husband’s name is also typically put on the original birth record as the father. The surrogate’s husband’s name can be removed from the birth certificate upon the parent’s execution of an acknowledgement of paternity, however there is usually no similar procedure available for the intended mother (genetic mother) who does not give birth. As a result, the surrogate must participate in a legal proceeding before birth to place both intended parent’s names on the original birth record and terminate her presumptive parental rights. 

In order to do this we had to go through a very expensive legal ‘battle’ in which we had to ‘serve’ them custody papers showing we were suing for legal parentage rights.  The courts have not yet caught up with modern time and therefore have no individualized paperwork for this process, instead the paperwork that is filed is the same paperwork used in a custody dispute.  Thankfully all parties were given a heads up for how harsh and abrupt the paperwork would read, if we were not forewarned it would have come to a shock for all of us when papers were ‘served’ reading "You Are Being Sued."  Thankfully it was an easy process since no one was consteding the custody and signing away legal rights was not an issue!  This custody hearing was totally opposite previous custody battles we have been through, and I only wish it was always this smooth and easy! 

But now that it is all done little man can show up at anytime - although we would like him to cook a little longer.  But if he does decide to kick his way free there will be no issues as to who are the 'legal' parents are.  Now just hoping the paperwork doesn't get lost in the mail on its way to us. 

So you are wondering what the countdown on the top of this blog is?  Well, we finally have our c-section date on the books.   Looks like Daddy and I will be having to share our anniversary with one special little man … May 16, 2014 we will finally get to meet this little miracle!  Best anniversary present we could ask for - at least we both get out of having to get each other gifts this year!

WEEK 31:
What’s going on with me this week:  My eyes have completely opened & dilate or contract in response to light/darkness.
I am going through major brain & nerve development this week.  I am processing information, tracking light and perceiving signals from all 5 of my senses.
My likes:  yawning, sucking my thumb, and giving hefty kicks to the diaphragm.
My turn-offs:  getting the hiccups, really loud noises and trying to do all that boring “sleeping” at night.  
I am already starting to take after mommy, I shouldn't be expected to wake up until at least noon … and play time should begin around 11 at night of course!


  1. Hi Emily! I'm a former IM who found your blog via SMO. Was checking in for an update on your little one's arrival! Also, I'm working on starting a FB group of moms via surrogacy who are also Christians. Please send me an email (disesther at yahoo dot com) if that sounds like something you'd be interested in joining. :)

  2. Hi Emily- Are the baby due yet?? Your last posting was in April.